Should My Spouse and I Live Together During a California Divorce?

Our Los Angeles family law attorneys at the Land Legal Group know that each of our client’s divorce circumstances is unique. By nature, divorces are deeply personal. For some, the idea of living with their soon-to-be-ex-spouse during their divorces is out of the question. For others, whether they have children they are putting first, or if they simply do not have the means to support two households right away, living together during their divorce proceedings is a combined decision they both stand by.

Unlike many states, California does not require couples to live separately for a certain period before they can file for divorce. That means living together will not impact your legal ability to get divorced after the six-month waiting period expires.

Personally, however, living together may be more challenging than each spouse imagined it would be. Here are a few ways to help you share space without compromising the integrity of your relationship further.

Separate Household Expenses, Responsibilities & Expectations

It may feel as though not much has changed, since you are both living under the same roof. The reality is, everything has changed.

Now is a suitable time to split the household expenses down the middle, so you can each understand the totality of your monthly costs, and how they will unfold once you do live separately.

In addition, separate household chores and expectations. For example, if one person works from home, it is unfair to assume he or she has more free time to pick up the kids or do more chores than the other. Split chores down the middle, so everyone is doing their fair share — especially if one spouse did the lion’s share of the chores before.

This can be fine tuned for meal preparation, shopping duties, taking the kids to school, and other activities.

Just as you are expected to do your share, it is imperative to be respectful of each other’s space and belongings while being courteous. If you and your spouse are fighting tooth and nail while sharing the same home during your divorce, it may be time to rethink this agreement.

Set Sincere Physical and Emotional Boundaries

Agreeing to live in the same home during a divorce is perfectly fine for some couples if the plan is to actually get divorced.

This means you and your spouse must set physical and emotional boundaries by sleeping in separate rooms and designating certain areas of the home as your space/their space to give each other the privacy you need during the divorce.

Plan for the Permanency of Divorce

Planning for divorce means getting your affairs in order, so both of your futures are protected. Living together during the divorce proceedings will give you plenty of time to outline your finances, child custody and child support decisions — when you share minor children — and how you will divide your assets and debts. This will allow you to understand whether you should sell the family home, and what you can afford going forward.

If you do have kids together, this is the perfect opportunity to learn how to communicate, practice timesharing, and divvy up responsibilities.

Talk to a Skilled Divorce Attorney in Los Angeles, California

If you plan to stay in the same home as your spouse while your divorce is underway, talk to our Los Angeles divorce lawyers to gain the professional advice and legal counsel that will allow you to make intelligent and informed decisions about life after divorce.

We can help you understand each aspect of your divorce, and what you can settle now, so you can finalize the paperwork immediately after the waiting period is over. Contact our skilled Los Angeles family law attorneys at the Land Legal Group today at (310) 552-3500 to schedule a free consultation to discuss your unique needs and to learn how we can help.